


maria

by katieelle



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - No Squip, Fluff, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, M/M, Michael Mell Bites Ice Cream, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Slow Burn, Teacher Michael
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-15
Updated: 2018-06-19
Packaged: 2019-05-23 13:58:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,585
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14935620
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/katieelle/pseuds/katieelle
Summary: Jeremy is overworked, stressed out, and uptight, trying desperately to make ends meet for himself and his half sister he's been raising since she was two.Enter Mr. Mell, Maria's spontaneous 1st grade teacher who is determined to help Jeremy learn to live.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> i....don't know what this is.

Jeremy slips the straps of Maria’s Spiderman backpack over her shoulders, empty of the supplies she was supposed to buy for her first grade year, but it does include an apple that she had insisted on bringing for her new teacher. He snaps a picture of her standing by the doorway because he feels like that’s what he’s supposed to do on her first day of a new grade. She’s already changed so much since her kindergarten year -- she’s taller, her hair is turning to a darker shade of blonde, and she smiles bigger. For a guy who had never wanted kids in the first place and started raising her when he was 19, he’s done a pretty damn good job. To be fair, he did require a lot of help from his high school best friend Christine, but all the same. 

Technically, she wasn’t his daughter. She was his sister. Years after disappearing, his mother called informing him and his dad that she was pregnant. The father was her drug dealer who fled town not even a month after hearing the news of his unborn child. For a while during the pregnancy, his mother managed to stay sober. After giving birth and falling into postpartum depression, she relapsed. She’d be gone for months at a time and Jeremy spent countless days looking after Maria while his mother was who the fuck knew where. 

He was 19 when he realized that he couldn’t let Maria stay in their mother’s disease infested apartment any longer. After school, he had gone over to check up on her and walked in on his sister holding a heroin needle in her tiny hand. That was it. He picked her up and took her back to his own apartment without turning back. 

Their mother barely noticed a difference. 

“Jermie?” Maria’s sweet voice calls from the doorway, still unable to pronounce the extra ‘e’ in his name. She has her hand reaching up to the doorknob, waiting eagerly. “When are we going?” 

“Now.” Jeremy grabs her hand and walks her down a block to the bus stop. He silently prays that the bus isn’t late. It’ll usually come around 8:30, which leaves him half an hour to get to work. If it’s late and he hits traffic on the way there, he’ll never make it on time. At 8:31, it’s still not there, and Jeremy is trying hard not to panic. He cannot be late, he cannot be late, he  _ needs  _ this job. 

He feels Maria tugging on his hand. “What’s wrong?” she asks. Even at a young age, he can see the concern she has for him in her green eyes. 

“No-nothing,” he stutters, shifting his weight back and forth between his feet. The bus arrives at 8:32 and he’s immediately relieved. “Have fun, I love you, and Christine will be here to pick you up at 3:00, okay?” He gives her a quick kiss on the cheek and she nods, filing into the stream of children boarding the bus. Once he watches it safely pull away, he hurries back to the apartment, grabs a cup of coffee, and heads out the door once again. 

It’s not like his job is any fun, but in his situation, it’s the best job he could ask for. The hours are 9-5, meaning he only has to have a babysitter for two hours on weekdays. It doesn’t require a college degree because all he has to do is take calls and redirect them to the correct departments, schedule meetings, and file paperwork. He makes it to the insurance company with ten minutes to spare, already exhausted before he even clocks in. 

When he sits down at his desk, he checks his email right away. He hovers his mouse over a message from his boss with the subject title, “IMPORTANT.” Maybe he’s getting fired?  _ God,  _ what if he opens the email and it just says “ **YOU’RE FIRED** ” in bold text? He wouldn’t be surprised if he fucked  _ something  _ up. 

Hesitantly, he clicks on the email and sinks down in his chair. Well, at least he’s not fired. Instead, he’s being tasked with making a chart to display their number of clients in relation to prices over the past three years on top of all the other shit he has to do. He’s pretty sure they have data analyzers that are specialized in this kind of stuff, so it doesn’t make any sense whatsoever. He’ll do it anyways, though, because he can’t risk getting fired for not making a fucking chart. 

_ Jeremy: hey can u watch maria for maybe an extra two hours? might be at work late _

_ Christine: i have a job too _

_ Jeremy: fuck  _

Goddammit, goddammit, why the fuck does God hate him? Maybe it’s because he says things like ‘goddammit.’ His mind is racing and it won’t stop and he’s thinking about pointless things when he needs to be thinking about getting his shit done and - _ fuck.  _ He slams a fist down on the desk in frustration at himself and the world, drawing a few glares from his coworkers. 

It’s okay, he’s okay. He takes a deep breath and answers his first call of the day. 

-

Jeremy rushes through his apartment door and almost trips when Maria comes rushing forward to hug his legs. “Thanks, Christine,” he say breathlessly.

“Yep.” She’s grabbing her bag and leaving before Jeremy can say another word. Maybe that’s a good thing. 

He grabs a box of mac and cheese and starts boiling water on the stove. It’s easy and fast, but it feels like it takes forever. He had decided to finish the stupid chart thing at home, which would be hard with his second job that he does from home. He had picked up programming somewhere along the way and started coding websites for people and businesses, and he has two he's working on that are supposed to be done in two days. He frantically stirs the pasta, hoping it would somehow make it cook faster. “Hey, Maria, want to tell me about your first day now?” 

“I have an awesome new teacher!” she says, climbing up to sit on one of the two chairs they had at their tiny table. “His name is Mr. Mell, and he said he really liked the apple I gave him.” 

“That’s great,” he says. He drains the pasta and adds in the milk and cheese powder with a bit of extra butter, the way that Maria likes it. “Did he -- uh -- did he mention anything about if you didn’t have your school supplies yet?” Jeremy really didn’t have the extra money to spend on stuff for school when he could barely afford their rent, so he hoped the school would provide anything that they were missing. 

“Mmhm,” she hums. “He said he’ll buy the stuff for me, cause the school can’t buy it.” 

Jeremy scoops some of the mac and cheese into a bowl and passes it to Maria. He takes a few bites right out of the pot for himself. “No, no no,” he stammers. “Let him know that I’ll buy it, I just need to wait until I get paid.” He knows a teacher’s salary isn’t much better than what he makes now and he’ll be getting some extra cash soon from the websites. 

“You can tell him tonight,” she says through a mouthful of macaroni. 

“I -- what?” he asks. “Why would I see him tonight?”

“You know, they have the parents meeting teachers thing tonight.”   


Fuck. He totally forgot about that. “Maria, sweetie, I’m so so sorry,” he begins to say. “I don’t think we’ll be able to go, I’ve just got so much to do tonight. I really wish I could come.” 

Maria lets her fork fall to the floor and she crosses her arms. “You never take me to anything! You don’t even care!” 

It makes his heart drop. He cares, he cares so  _ fucking much,  _ it’s why he started raising her in the first place and it’s why he’s working two jobs and it’s why he never takes a fucking break. He just wishes he could make her understand that he’s doing the best he can do. “Maria, of course I care. Tomorrow after school, I’ll take you to the park and we’ll get ice cream, okay? I just can’t tonight.” Maria still seems unconvinced, refusing to look him in the eyes. Dammit. Usually she always gives in to the offer of ice cream. He can finish the websites tomorrow night, and as long as he gets the chart done by around nine, he should be fine. He’ll figure it out. “Alright, we can go. We’d better leave soon, so finish your food, okay?” 

Maria claps and goes back to her mac and cheese. Jeremy sighs and rubs his face in his hands, leaning up against the counter. He needs a nap. 

-

Maria excitedly leads Jeremy down the hallway to her classroom. Most of the crowd of parent visitation night seems to have died down, with only a few parents still lingering. It’s a blessing and a curse. With less people, they’ll be able to get through the visit much quicker. But with less people, he’ll likely be alone in the room with Maria’s teacher and they’ll be forced to make awkward small talk the whole time. He feels his hands starting to sweat and he hopes to god Mr. Mell doesn’t try to shake his hand. 

Maria turns a corner and enters a room, running forward to say hi to her new teacher. He’s younger than Jeremy expected, with a mess of dark hair that matches his thick glasses. He reaches down to muss up her hair, which she giggles at. Mr. Mell looks up and smiles at Jeremy, reaching out a hand for him to shake. Fuck his life. Jeremy takes his hand and cringes as he shakes it, hoping he doesn’t notice the sweat. “Nice to meet you.”

“You too, uh, Mr. Mell,” he stutters. 

“Michael. It’s Michael. Please don’t call me Mr. Mell,” Michael laughs. Jeremy doesn’t get what’s so funny. “So, Maria is your daughter then?” he asks, gesturing to Maria, who has preoccupied herself with a book from Michael’s extensive library.

“Oh,  _ god no,”  _ Jeremy says laughing. Michael gives him a strange look and Jeremy realizes how awful that sounded. Why can’t he just fucking make conversation like a normal person. “No, I mean, I raised her. She’s my sister, though. You know, fucked up mom -- wait, wait, shit I’m sorry,” he lowers his voice, glancing over at Maria to make sure she isn’t listening. Michael chuckles and Jeremy goes back to whispering. “I mean,  _ messed up, _ mom. I kind of took her in, been raising her pretty much alone for five years now, with some help from my friend Christine.” 

“That’s very kind of you and her,” Michael says. “You should know you’re doing a lovely job. She’s such a sweet girl and she seems very bright from what I can tell so far.” 

“Oh! I almost forgot!” Jeremy says. “About her school stuff, I can get it. I just have to wait until I get paid.” 

“Don’t worry about it. Seriously, it’s no problem. You seem to have your hands pretty full.” 

_ If he only knew.  _ “Uh -- uh, yeah, I guess so,” he laughs awkwardly. What the fuck else is he supposed to say?

“If you ever need anything for Maria for school, just let me know. I’m always happy to help. You can call the school and my extension is 031, or if it’s easier, I can just give you my number….” Michael trails off, already taking out his phone. 

“No, it’s okay,” Jeremy says before he can get any further. He does  _ not  _ have time for pretty boys that are also his little sister’s elementary school teacher. “Thanks, though.” 

Michael nods and dejectedly puts his phone away. For a few moments that feel like hours, there’s an uncomfortable silence that neither of them can figure out how to break. Jeremy looks over and notices that Michael has a computer at his desk. He probably has much better office programs than Jeremy and much faster internet, too. He can get that chart done much faster and still have time to work on those websites when he gets home. “Hey, this is going to sound weird, but I have a work thing and I was wondering if I can use your computer for it? It won’t take too long, it’s just that my computer isn’t the best for this sort of thing so…”

“Sure,” Michael cuts him off. “No problem.”  _ Yes, perfect.  _ While Jeremy works on his project, Michael reads a book to Maria to keep her busy for a while. He doesn’t have much left to do, he’d already worked on it during his break and whenever he wasn’t getting any calls. He had a few extra things to add and then it would be good to go. 

He tries to type as quickly as possible without making any errors. It suddenly feels too hot in the room and he’s sweating as he types, each click of the keyboard sounding louder than the last. When he finally finishes, he looks over the final product and actually thinks it looks pretty nice. It’s detailed but still easy to understand and it’s, as far as he’s aware, accurate. He opens up his email to send it to his boss and notices he has something new in his inbox from him. This one is titled, “EVEN MORE IMPORTANT.” Squinting at the text, he opens up the email. 

_ “Sorry, Jeremy Heere, meant to send that email to Jeremy Hopp! Technology can be a pain sometimes, am I right? LOL!”  _

Jeremy slams a fist down on the keyboard. 


	2. Chapter 2

Jeremy takes Maria out to eat to celebrate her first week of first grade. There’s a diner down the street that they eat at often because it’s cheap and they always leave with leftovers. As per usual, it takes Maria a long time to decide what she wants. Their waitress keeps coming back to ask if they’re ready and Jeremy has to keep saying no. In the end, she ends up asking for the same thing she always gets -- chicken tenders, french fries, and applesauce. At least she’s eating fruits. 

As soon as the waitress leaves after taking their order, Maria is already complaining about how hungry she is. “Be patient, alright?” Jeremy says, but the smell of all of the delicious food around them is making him pretty hungry, too. “Wanna tell me about your first week to distract yourself?” 

Maria takes a sip of her chocolate milk. “One time, Mr. Mell took class out for more recess, even though he says he’s not really supposed to.” A rule-breaking elementary school teacher? Interesting. 

“Oh yeah? What do you like to do at recess?” 

He already knows the answer to this because every time he takes her to the park, she wants to do the same thing. She wants to go on the swings and she wants to swing really high, which Jeremy keeps telling her is  _ very  _ dangerous and he will not push her any higher, but she doesn’t seem interested in listening to his warnings. “I like to swing. And Mr. Mell pushes me on the swing sometimes, he lets me go higher than you.” 

“Oh, he  _ better not.”  _ If Maria got hurt falling off of a swing, he would not  _ hesitate  _ to sue the shit out of that school. Not that he had any money to do so, but the threat still had meaning. Before he can get any angrier, the waitress is bringing their food and he forgets about everything when he sees that amazing cheeseburger. 

He starts cutting up Maria’s chicken tenders into pieces while she snacks on french fries. He tries to hurry, knowing that she’s hungry and his cheeseburger will start to get cold soon. “Anything else about school?” he asks when he’s finished and he can finally start eating his own food. Delicious, as usual. 

“Well, there’s a daddy-daughter dance, but I can’t go because I don’t have a daddy.” 

Jeremy stops mid-chew. “That’s bullshit,” he blurts before he can stop himself. “I mean, that’s not right. When is it?” 

“I don’t remember,” she shrugs. “I have a paper in my bookbag about it though.” Jeremy nods to himself, thinking. There’s no way Maria is going to be excluded from a dance just because she doesn’t have a conventional family. Suddenly, the ‘suing the school’ plan is starting to seem like a  _ really  _ good idea. 

“I’ll go with you. I mean, I’m not  _ really  _ your dad, but I act like your dad. That counts for something, right?” 

“Right,” Maria says, shoving a fry into her mouth. “Can I get a dress?” 

There’s a thrift store nearby, they’ll have cheap dresses. “Yeah, we’ll get a dress.” An elementary school dance isn’t really Jeremy’s type of thing, but it’ll make Maria happy, so he’ll go. He’ll even put on some of his nicer work clothes. 

When they finish eating and they get home, Jeremy searches through Maria’s backpack looking for the paper about the dance. He finds it crumpled up at the bottom of the bag, thankfully though, it’s still readable. The dance is set for next Friday at five pm. Shit. He’ll need to be home by at least four if he wants to have Maria ready on time and be able to make it to the school before the dance starts. 

Maybe if he’s lucky his boss will let him clock out an hour early? He never asks to leave early or come in late, so his boss shouldn’t have too much of a problem with it as long as they’re not too busy. God, but what if he  _ does  _ have a problem with it? And he already promised Maria he’d go to the dance. First thing at work on monday, he’ll ask his boss if he can leave early friday. And if he says no,  _ fuck.  _ He’ll think about that when the time comes. 

-

It’s a Sunday morning and Jeremy is making scrambled eggs. It’s going to be a good day, he knows it is. He doesn’t have work, Maria doesn’t have school, they can go to the park or get ice cream or rent a movie. And afterwards, he’ll still have time to work on the website he needs finished by Wednesday. He pours two glasses of orange juice and sets them on the table. He splits up the eggs onto two different plates and sits down to eat with Maria. “That good?” he asks. 

She can’t speak with a mouthful of scrambled eggs, but she hums and nods. Jeremy isn’t very good with cooking, but since taking care of Maria, he had to figure out how to make some simple foods. His specialty is peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. 

“What do you wanna do today?” he asks. “We can get ice cream, or we can rent a movie. We can build a huge fort, we haven’t done that in a while.”

“Yes!” she exclaims, sitting up in her chair further. “I want another fort!”

Perfect for Jeremy. It’s free and he doesn’t even have to leave the house to do it. 

There’s a knock on the door, startling both of them. Weird. His landlord usually never comes to the rooms individually and if he does, it’s because someone’s late on rent. Jeremy  _ knows  _ he isn’t late on rent. He cautiously looks through the peephole of the door and he feels his stomach sink. “Maria?” he calls out to the kitchen. “Maria, go to your room.” 

“Jermie, why?”

“ _ Now,”  _ he repeats. He listens to her footsteps as they hurry back the hall. He carefully opens the door, keeping it mostly closed other than a small crack that he can hear and speak through. “What the fuck do you want?” he snaps. 

“I want my fucking daughter back,” his mother’s voice comes from the other side of the door. She’s pushing on the door, using all of her strength to try to get it to swing open. Jeremy keeps his body in place, back to the door, feet glued to the floor as he counters her shoving. “I know you have her in here.”

“I don’t have her,” he lies through gritted teeth. “Now get out of here before I call the cops.” 

He can’t call the cops. If he does, Maria would be taken by child services because he doesn’t legally have custody of her and he doesn’t have the money to win a court case to get custody. But his mother doesn’t know this. All she knows is that she doesn’t want any cops involved. 

“I’m her mother,” she wails. “I took care of her when she was a baby!”

“Oh, fuck off,” Jeremy mumbles. “You know you didn’t do shit for her. I’m the one that was always there.” 

It’s a good thing his mother has been weakened by heroin abuse. If she hadn’t, she would have been able to overpower Jeremy and get through the door with just one shove. 

“She’s my daughter,” she tries, but nothing she can say will make Jeremy open the door. 

“Leave now. I have my phone right here and I am about to dial 911.” 

“Fine, you dick, but I  _ will  _ be back. And I  _ will  _ get my daughter back.”

The pressure from the other side of the door is gone and it slams shut. Jeremy watches her leave through the peephole, then collapses with his back against the door and his heart beating fast. “Fuck,” he mutters to himself, rubbing his face in his hands. “Maria!” he calls. “You can come out now!” 

Jeremy goes back to the kitchen and sits down at the table. He isn’t hungry for his eggs anymore. “Who was it?” Maria asks, cautiously stepping back into the room. 

“It was just--just,” Jeremy stutters. “Just a delivery man. He brought the package to the wrong room.” 

Maria nods, but Jeremy knows she can sense that something is off. She doesn’t ask anymore questions. 

So much for having a good day. 

-

On Monday, Jeremy gets to work early. Even before he clocks in, he goes straight to his boss’ office. “Mr. Thatcher?” he says quietly and his boss looks up from the computer. “He-hey, so I was just, you know, just wondering…”

“What do ya need, kid?” his boss asks, folding his arms on his desk. Well  _ that  _ looks pretty intimidating despite his cheery voice. 

“Um, I have to take my sister to something for school, so I was just wondering if on friday maybe if I could leave an hour early so I don’t miss it. If I not, I completely understand, but I--”

“Sure thing,” Mr. Thatcher says, going back to whatever he was doing on his computer. Jeremy felt relief wash over him and he couldn’t wait to get home and take Maria to pick out a dress for the dance. 

-

“Christine?” Jeremy calls into the apartment when he gets home from work. “Wanna come with me to get Maria a dress for a school dance thing?” Christine emerges from the living room with a pale look on her face. She stares at the ground, trying not to meet his eyes. “What’s wrong?”

His mind immediately goes to the worst. Maybe his mom showed up while Christine was there and took Maria. Maybe Christine didn’t get to the bus stop in time and Maria lost when she got off school. Christine still isn’t saying anything, why the fuck won’t she say anything? “I can’t,” she says, her voice cracking. “I can’t do this anymore.”

“What do you mean?” 

“I got a promotion at work,” she begins to explain. “My hours are changing. I won’t be able to get Maria off the bus anymore.” And everything that was going well for Jeremy seems to crumble. He can’t let Maria home alone for that long, she could hurt herself or someone else may hurt her. He can’t leave work early every day, he’ll get fired. Usually, when he’s overwhelmed, his mind feels like it won’t shut off, a million thoughts bouncing around in his mind at once. But this time, it’s just empty. He’s gone blank. There’s nothing there. “I’m so sorry, Jeremy. I have to take this promotion to help myself.”

He can’t blame Christine. She never asked to be brought into this mess, but she did everything she could to help him. “It’s okay,” he says, sitting down at the table, resting his head in his hands. He feels Christine place a comforting hand on his shoulder. “I just -- I just don’t know what to do.” 

It seems like an impossible situation. It seems like there’s no solution that won’t result in Maria getting hurt or him losing his job. “I have an idea,” Christine says, her voice lightening up. “What about an after-school thing? They might have some activities she can do after school and you can pick her up when she’s done.” 

Once again, Christine is saving his sorry ass. He stands up and kisses her on the cheek, making her laugh wildly. “You are a genius, Christine Canigula,” he says. “Good luck with your promotion, I’ve gotta go figure out what she can do after school.” 

Christine shuffles out of the door and Jeremy finds Maria sitting in the living room watching TV. “Hey, Maria, we have to go up to your school really quick. We’re going to find something really fun for you to do after school.”

“Like what?” she asks. She slips on her shoes and Jeremy shuts off the TV. 

“I’m...not sure yet. But we’re going to find out now, okay?” He hurries her through the door and helps her into the car. 

For now, the dress will have to wait. 

Jeremy doesn’t even know for sure if the school will still be open by the time he gets there, but hopefully there will be someone he can talk to in the office. And hopefully there’s something that Maria will like, she  _ is  _ pretty picky. Oh god, what if she doesn’t find anything she likes? What if they don’t even  _ have  _ the activities Christine was talking about at her school? Focus on the road Jeremy, focus on the fucking road. 

He pulls into the school parking lot and marches up to the main office, pressing the buzzer to be let in. The door clicks open and he enters, pleased to find that there’s a woman still at her desk in the office. “How can I help you?” she asks suspiciously. 

“Do you have any after school clubs or stuff like that my daughter can sign up for?” he asks impatiently. 

“Mhm, of course.” She takes a piece of paper out of a folder and starts reading through it. “She can do a dance club, we have board games club, puzzle club, origami club….” She continues listing and they all sound god awful. He couldn’t force himself to make Maria go to a fucking  _ board games club.  _ She finally says something that piques his interest as she nears the bottom of the list. “Art club.” 

Maria likes to draw and paint. “That!” he says. “Art club. Can she sign up for that?” 

“Of course,” she says. She slides him a paper to sign and a pen. “It starts right after school and lasts two hours, so it’s over at 5.” She explains some other information about the kind of stuff they’ll do, but he isn’t too focused on that. If it ends at 5, that means he’ll have to pick her up about twenty minutes late….that’s not too long, is it? As long as the supervisor of the club is decent, it should be fine. He eagerly signs the paper, happy that he’s found a solution, and slides it back to her. 

The door swings open and Jeremy turns to look. “Maria! What are you doing here?” Jesus Christ, not this guy again. Michael, if he’s remembering his name right, bends down so he’s at eye-level with Maria. 

“I get to join art club!” she says excitedly. 

“Really? That’s great! I’ll see you there.” 

Of course. Of  _ fucking course  _ the pretty-boy teacher has to be the art club leader. Just Jeremy’s luck. “You’re the art club leader?” he asks, just to be sure.

“Yep,” he says, standing up again. “Thursdays we have a parents’ night thing, so if you wanted to come and paint something….”

“Nope, can’t, gotta be at work.” 

Maria looks up at him with sad eyes. “But Jermie, can’t you come paint with me just once?  _ Please,  _ Jermie?”

Michael smirks and steps a little closer to Jeremy. “Yeah Jermie,” he teases. “ _ Please?”  _

“I’ll think about it.” 

Michael gives Maria a high five. Fuck him and his stupid pretty face. He has to play nice, though, if he wants to be able to pick Maria up a little bit later after the club meetings. 

“Hey, Michael, by the way,” he starts, immediately capturing the teacher’s attention. “I don’t get off work until 5, so is it okay with you if I pick Maria up maybe twenty minutes late?” 

“Sure, I usually don’t leave until later anyways since I have to get papers ready for the next day.” Jeremy is about to thank him and leave, but Michael speaks up before he can get outside. “But in case anything ever comes up where I do have to leave or I’m not here or something, I should probably get your number.” 

There’s no way out of this because he’s right. Michael might not always be able to stay late and Maria can’t be at the school alone. And if that happens, Jeremy will need to know. Dammit, this guy’s smart. “Sure,” Jeremy says, faking an enthusiastic smile. Maybe he’s gone a bit overboard though, because Michael seems to know that Jeremy’s not so thrilled about giving him his number. He quickly types it into Michael’s phone and is ready to get the fuck out of there, but Michael stops him  _ again.  _

“And will I be seeing you two at the daddy-daughter dance on Friday?” 

“Yes! I can’t wait!” Maria says.

“Yeah, and we have to go get her a dress now. It was good seeing you.” Jeremy quickly hurries out the door before Michael can get another word in. He feels his phone buzz in his pocket and takes it out to read the text. 

_ 606-743-0982: pick out something nice for the dance :) _

Jeremy is going to lose his fucking mind. 


	3. Chapter 3

Jeremy takes a few moments to observe himself in the mirror. Maybe he’s gone a bit too formal for an elementary school daddy-daughter dance, but Michael  _ did  _ say to dress nice. It’s something he would wear if he had to attend a meeting at work; a pale blue shirt tucked into black pants with a grey blazer over top. Even better, his shirt matches Maria’s dress. It’s the same color blue and it has a silver glittery belt that goes around the waist because Maria had complained that it was too plain. 

He takes a picture of Maria standing by the door in her dress. Briefly, he wishes he could be in the picture with her, but he is  _ not  _ going to take a selfie. And even if he would, you wouldn’t be able to see how they matched in the picture anyway. Whatever. It isn’t a big deal. “Alright, we better leave before we’re late,” Jeremy says and opens the door. Maria takes off, sprinting down the hallway to the staircase at the end. “Maria!” he calls after her. He mutters under his breath before chasing after her and finding her waiting at the door to leave. “You can’t run away from me like that.” 

“I”m just waiting here,” she shrugs. 

Jeremy scratches his head. “I mean, yeah, but I--I couldn’t see you a for a little bit. What if something happened? We have to be careful.” Jeremy opens the door, this time holding Maria’s hand as he walks out to his car. It’s a little hot outside and he sort of regrets wearing the jacket, but he’ll look stupid without it, so he’ll keep it on and suffer. 

Maria climbs into the backseat and waits for Jeremy to buckle her seatbelt. When he turns on the car, the radio is playing  _ Sugar, Sugar  _ and Maria is already humming along. “Turn it up, Jermie, I like this song,” she says. 

He turns the volume up just a few notches. “That’s it, alright? If it’s too loud it’ll hurt your ears.” He’d read something once about how listening to music too loud could damage your hearing. Maybe that was just with headphones, though? Either way, he isn’t about to risk causing Maria to lose her hearing early. 

“I can’t even hear it!” she whines. 

“There will be plenty of music at the dance, okay?” 

Jeremy doesn’t want to admit that he’s actually  _ excited.  _ All of the dances he’d been to in high school were fucking awful and he ended up getting rejected by every girl he’d asked to dance with because he hadn’t been able to secure an actual date. He thought maybe getting a dance with Chloe Valentine or Brooke Lohst would make up for the fact that he had gone stag, but that plan crumbled not even ten minutes into the night. It had been a  _ nightmare.  _

And, yeah, a daddy-daughter dance won’t be able to fulfill his dreams of sweeping the popular girl off her feet and becoming homecoming king, but at least he can rewrite bad memories of dances and replace them with good ones. 

His stomach growls as he’s driving and he realizes how hungry he is. Hopefully there’s food there, although it’s probably just chips and punch brought in by volunteers. Wait, was he supposed to bring in food? Fuck, he should have read that paper more thoroughly. 

The parking lot outside the school is getting pretty full. God, why are there so many people here? How many dads are at this school? He’s going to be stuck in a room full of dads telling dad jokes for two hours. Great. 

He helps Maria out of the car and holds her hand as they walk up to the school. When they go through the doors, there are signs pointing them in the direction of the gymnasium. Thank  _ god.  _ Otherwise. Jeremy would have been wandering uselessly around the school for the entire two hours of the event. 

The gym is decorated with pink and purple balloons and there are already people awkwardly dancing, but Jeremy is more focused on the tables of food in the back. “Are you hungry? We can eat first.”

_ Please say yes please say yes please say y-  _ “Yeah, I’m hungry,” she says, and she starts weaving through the crowd of people effortlessly. Jeremy has a bit more difficulty with this because he’s much bigger and he has to stop and apologize every time he bumps into someone, or every time someone bumps into him. 

It’s a little weird that no one else is eating, but maybe they’re just not hungry yet. So he grabs two plates and hands one to Maria, eyeing up their options. Potato chips, pretzels, party mix, a bowl of punch and a bowl of water, the usual. “What do you want?” he asks. 

She points out a bag of cheetos and the pretzels, so Jeremy scoops a little bit of each onto her plate and then grabs her a cup of punch. He makes his own meal then, with the party mix and a cup of water. The best part is that it’s the actual  _ Chex Mix party mix,  _ not the shitty off-brand kind he buys at Walmart. “Excuse me,” Jeremy hears, and he reluctantly looks up from his plate of snacks to see Michael standing there, arms crossed, eyes glaring down at him.

“Yeah?” 

“You’re not actually supposed to be eating yet.” 

So there Jeremy is, stuck between a plate of party mix and one of the prettiest boys he’s ever seen because Michael has also decided to dress up. Jeremy hates the way he looks in that red shirt and that brown leather jacket and those thick-framed glasses that contradict the rest of his look. He tries not to look at his black jeans and the way they hug his form, but he  _ is  _ looking and Michael is  _ definitely  _ noticing.  _ Pull yourself together, Jeremy.  _

Jeremy glances nervously between Maria, his party mix, and Michael. “Oh, shit. Sorry. I mean we were hungry and we saw the food over here, so we just came and got some. I can put this party mix back in the bowl if you want….?”

“No, no,” Michael stops him. “It’s fine. Just eat it anyways.” 

Jeremy tries to enjoy his party mix, but he can’t because Michael is there staring him down and neither of them know what to say and, fuck, even Maria looks like she’s feeling the uncomfortable air around them. “So, uh,” Michael starts to say, because anything is better than standing there in silence. “I like how Maria’s dress matches your shirt. It’s cute.”

“Thanks, you too,” Jeremy says out of instinct, not even realizing what he’s said until a few moments after he’s already said it. “Oh, wait. I wasn’t calling you cute. I mean, you’re not  _ not  _ cute, that’s just not what I meant. What I meant was….thanks.” 

Sometimes, having Maria with him is a true blessing for Jeremy. Before Michael can respond, Maria is tugging at his sleeve and interrupting them. “Jermie, I see my friend Emma. Can I go say hi?”

“Sure,” Jeremy says, watching as Maria walks up to a girl with red hair and starts talking to her. She’s not too far, so Jeremy stays where he is and keeps an eye on her. 

“So, I just wanted to say,” Michael says after a deep breath. He steps a little closer to Jeremy and Jeremy tries to pretend that he doesn’t notice it. “I know I’ve been acting kind of….god, what’s the word? Flirty, I’ve been acting kind of flirty around you and it was weird and I’m sorry. I didn’t know you had a girlfriend and I was just….having fun, you know? But, anyways, sorry about that. I’ll stop.” 

“It’s--it’s okay,” he stutters, because  _ wow  _ that was unexpected. What he wants to say is  _ don’t stop.  _ He wants to tell him not to stop because it’s cute, the way Michael subtly but not-so-subtly, flirts with him. God,  _ Michael  _ is cute. He can’t say it though, because he’s not even allowed to  _ think  _ that. He’s  _ not allowed.  _ So he bites his tongue on that thought and drowns it out. “I don’t have a girlfriend, though,” he finds himself saying. 

“Oh, really?” Michael looks genuinely taken aback. “We just did a thing in art club where we had the kids draw pictures of their families. Maria drew you and a girl with black hair.” 

“Christine,” Jeremy says. “She’s not my girlfriend, she just helped me a lot with Maria. She’s my best friend from high school.”

“That’s really sweet of her. I never really had a best friend in high school, or really  _ any _ friends for that matter.” Michael laughs about it, but Jeremy can tell it isn’t a real laugh. He’s laughing to make it seem like it doesn’t bother him even though it bothers him  _ a lot.  _ Jeremy can tell because he does this all the time. 

Maria comes running back and grabs Jeremy by the hand. “Can we dance now?” she asks, and Jeremy (reluctantly) lets her lead him further into the crowd, with Michael awkwardly trailing behind them. Maria begins to spin around in circles, her dress flowing out around her. She laughs at herself, stumbling around on her feet as she gets more dizzy. It’s an unconventional dance move, he’ll admit, but Maria seems to be having fun with it. 

Jeremy tries swaying along to the music, but his body is stiff. It probably knows how fucking ridiculous he looks and it’s his body’s natural response to prevent him from looking like a complete idiot. There are dads surrounding him performing the most stereotypical dad dances imaginable, including the one guy he sees doing the robot. At least he isn’t  _ that  _ guy. “No, no, no,” he hears Michael say through a laugh. “You’re doing it all wrong.”

Jeremy stops and stills completely. “Oh right, like  _ you  _ could do much better,” he challenges. Michael steps forward and picks Maria up effortlessly, then spins around once before gently placing her back down. He grabs her hand and twirls her, then steps back to take a bow. “Alright. Damn. That was pretty good.”

“Let’s see your moves, Mr. Heere.” 

Jesus Christ,  _ no.  _ Jeremy Heere, dancing in a way that isn’t just swaying to the side slightly? That’s a disaster waiting to happen that no one wants to see. “I don’t think that’s a good idea,” he says. 

Disappointment crosses Michael’s face. Actual,  _ real  _ disappointment, like he just couldn’t wait to see Jeremy completely embarrass himself. “Come on, you just have to….loosen up a bit. Look, Maria’s a great dancer.” Maria is doing less dancing and more jumping around, but Michael statement remains true. 

There is a dance that Jeremy knows. He’d learned it back in high school just in case he got to dance with Chloe Valentine or Brooke Lohst, and he had practiced it so many times that it was basically burned into his mind. It was simple and only included a few steps of the feet that repeated, but it had felt like a major accomplishment at the time. “Alright, fine,” he agrees reluctantly, taking Maria’s hands. He counts the steps in his head, moving his feet and his arms in coordination. Maria can’t follow along, of course, but she bounces from foot to foot anyways. 

“Not too bad, Jeremy,” Michael jokes. “But can you beat this?” 

And they continue on like that, trying to one up each other’s dancing, each move becoming more and more ridiculous. Maria doesn’t seem to mind, and surprisingly, Jeremy doesn’t each other. He starts to forget where he is, he forgets that he’s surrounded by other people who could look over at him at any time and see he stupid he looks. For a while, it feels like it’s only him, Maria, and Michael, and somehow he’s content with that. 

-

“Jermie, I want ice cream!” It’s the end of the night and they’re about to head home, saying their goodbyes to Michael when Maria decides to start begging for ice cream. 

“Maria, it’s late. You’ll be up all night if you eat ice cream now.” 

She pouts and stomps her foot on the ground. It’s going to be one of  _ those  _ nights. “But I don’t have school tomorrow so it’s okay.” 

“This month’s rent is coming up soon, I don’t have extra money to be throwing around.” 

Maria turns her focus away from Jeremy and looks up at Michael instead. Jeremy knows where this is going, and he reaches out for Maria to try and stop her, but the words are already leaving her mouth. “Mr. Mell, can you please get me an ice cream?” 

“Maria!” Jeremy scolds. “That is very rude. Apologize, okay?” Jeremy faces Michael, his cheeks flushed, as Maria mutters a sorry. “God, Michael, I’m so sorry. I don’t know why she’s acting like this.” 

“Honestly….” Michael trails off. “I kind of do want ice cream. We can go get ice cream somewhere if you want.”

“For Maria,” Jeremy makes sure to remind him. He doesn’t want Michael getting the wrong idea. “We’ll go get ice cream for Maria.” 

“Yeah, for Maria. Of course,” Michael grins. “We can just take my car and then I’ll bring you back here whenever we’re done. Save on gas.” 

“Save on gas, right.” 

They exchange awkward smiles while Maria celebrates what she sees as a win. Michael leads them outside to where his car is parked. Now, Jeremy definitely isn’t one to judge people based on their cars, but  _ really?  _ It’s just so…. _ ugly.  _ “Is this a….” Jeremy starts to ask. 

Before Jeremy can finish his question, Michael is already answering. “A PT Cruiser? Yeah.” 

To make matters worse, it’s a bright red color, barely worn down despite its obvious old age. He must have had it repainted recently, and for some reason, that idea is  _ hilarious  _ to Jeremy. The fact that Michael would waste money repainting an old PT Cruiser instead of saving up for a better car. “Are you laughing at my car?” Michael asks. 

“I’m not,” Jeremy says, as he is laughing. “I’m really not, I swear.” Jeremy runs his hand over the side of it as Michael glares at him. “I mean it’s beautiful. This is a high quality, top notch, beautiful vehicle. What is there to laugh at?”

“Not another word, Mr. Heere.” 

Jeremy smirks as he climbs into the passenger seat. 

-

They go to the ice cream stand that Jeremy always takes Maria to. It’s cheap, the ice cream is good, and there’s a park right next to it. “Can I have a cone with mint chocolate chip, a bowl of chocolate with rainbow sprinkles, and a….uh, Jeremy, what do you want?” 

Jeremy is caught off guard, head whipping around to look back and forth between Michael and the employee taking their order. “Me? Oh, no, I’m fine. Really.” 

“He’ll have a vanilla cone.” The employee nods and rings up their total, which Michael graciously pays for in full. 

“You really didn’t have to do that,” Jeremy whispers to him. The employee comes back with their ice cream and the three start digging in right away. It’s starting to cool off as the day turns to night, but it’s still hot out and Jeremy has to admit that the cold ice cream is pretty refreshing. “Hey, Maria, what do you say?” 

“Thank you, Mr. Mell,” she says, using the sweetest voice she can manage, the voice she uses when she desperately wants Jeremy to buy her something or take her somewhere. It always works, but he won’t admit it. 

“No problem.” They start making their way over to a bench by the playground and everything seems to be going fine until Jeremy happens to glance over and witness Michael  _ bite  _ his ice cream. 

He stops in his tracks, stunned to stillness. No way he just saw that, maybe his eyes are just playing tricks on him. Michael and Maria keep walking without noticing that Jeremy has stopped, but he watches them, and he does it  _ again.  _ Just bites straight into it, like a goddamn animal. “Hey, hey wait,” Jeremy calls out, jogging a little to catch up with them. “I’m sorry, did you just  _ bite  _ your ice cream?”

Michael does it again. Jeremy cringes in actual pain. “What the hell is wrong with you?” Jeremy asks. 

“It’s better if you bite it,” Michael says through a mouthful of ice cream. 

It is the most horrendous thing Jeremy has ever seen, but since Michael did buy the ice cream, he’ll have to let it slide. For now. They sit down on the bench and Maria finishes half of her bowl before trashing the rest and racing over to the playground. “She’s so smart, you know.” With his interest piqued, Jeremy turns to face Michael, eyes curious. “I mean, she writes amazingly well for a first grader. And her mental math is incredible. She can add without even thinking about it.” 

Jeremy smiles at himself, proud of accomplishments that aren’t even really his. But this means he must be doing  _ something  _ right. “I don’t know where she gets it from, because it’s definitely not from me, her mom, or her dad. It’s a mystery.” 

He goes back to focusing on his ice cream and Michael goes silent for a while. When he looks up again to see why Michael has stopped the conversation, he realizes that Michael is gazing at him, a drop of ice cream running down his hand while he is unphased by it. But as soon as Jeremy looks up, Michael is snapping out of it, and licking up the ice cream on his hand. “Was it hard?” he asks. “You know, raising her.” 

“Was it hard? Jesus Christ, it was a fucking  _ nightmare. _ ” And maybe that sounds a bit harsh, but it’s completely true. “I never wanted kids, and suddenly I’m taking care of a baby while I’m still in high school because my shitshow of a mother didn’t care about her. Fuck, I skipped  _ college  _ for her. And I’d do it again.” 

“How old were you when you legally got custody?”

“Custody?” Jeremy repeats. “Oh, I don’t have custody.”

“You  _ don’t? _ ” Michael asks, shocked. “Jeremy, you’ve got to get custody of her.” 

“I mean, I’ve definitely thought about it, but I don’t know how I’d afford a lawyer and I don’t even know if I’d be able to win custody.” 

“You don’t need some really expensive lawyer for this, Jeremy. Of  _ course  _ you’ll get custody. Your mother is an addict and you’ve been taking care of Maria for years. They may even set your mom up with court-ordered rehab.” 

“Really? You think so?” It just all seems too easy, there has to be a catch. 

“I’m sure. I’ll even help you file all the paperwork.” 

Okay, so he’s doing this. “Yeah. Yeah, that’d be….great. Thanks.” 

They finish off their cones while Jeremy mulls over the idea of having custody. He would have a lot less to worry about, including no more surprise visits from his mother claiming that she needs to see her daughter. He’d be her legal guardian, officially, not just the brother that takes care of her. It sounds….nice. He’d never really thought about it like this before because he was always too worried about how much money it would cost. He’s really gotta learn to stop jumping to conclusions. 

Jeremy looks up and sees Maria on the swing, kicking her legs back and forth but not going anywhere. “I’ll help her,” Michael says, wiping off his palms with a napkin and running over to the swingset. 

“Michael, no!” Jeremy calls out, running after him, but he’s too late. When he gets there, Maria is already swinging way above the safe level. “Michael! That’s too high!”

He gestures to her and tries motioning for Michael to stop, but it’s useless. “She’s fine,” Michael says, and maybe he’s right, because Maria is laughing and she hasn’t fallen off yet which is a good sign. Jeremy takes the swing next to her and starts racing her to the top, trying to kick his legs out farther than her. 

“Higher!” Maria commands, and for once, Jeremy doesn’t lecture her on how unsafe that is and he lets it happen. 

Maria has just eaten ice cream after 7pm, is probably getting her new dress dirty, and is swinging higher than ever, but Jeremy isn’t thinking about any of that. Instead, he’s laughing along with her and Michael, letting himself forget about all of the shit he has to deal with for just a few moments. 


End file.
